Human Dispositions

Each and every human being has many dispositions, and each one is both very different and very distant from any other: One person may have a violent temper, always angry; but another's mind is at ease and he is never angry, or if he does feel anger it is a soft anger once in several years. A person may be very haughty, but another has a very humble disposition. A person may have very strong desires, never satisfied; but another may have a very pure heart, not even desiring those few things that the body requires. A person may be very greedy, not satisfied by all the wealth in the world, as it states, "A lover of silver never has his fill of silver" (Ecclesiastes 5:9). But another may have modest desires, and is satisfied with the smallest thing even if it is not truly enough for him, and he will not exert himself to acquire what he needs. A person may torture himself with hunger and saves through this and does not eat from a farthing of his own, excepting in great duress. But another may consciously waste all of the money that is in his hand. And in these ways are the other dispositions - for example, the jolly [fellow] and the morose [one]; the stingy and the generous; the cruel and the merciful; the weak-hearted and the courageous, and similar to these.

Between each pair of extremes, there is a middle disposition equidistant from each. There are some dispositions that are innate, and some that individuals are more predisposed to than other dispositions, and still others that are not innate at all, but are learned from others or self-taught, either because he decided to acquire [this trait] or he heard from others that it is a good one to have and he practiced it until it became part of his personality.

Neither of the two extremes within each trait are appropriate ways to live, and one should not practice these extremes, and if he finds himself naturally inclined to one of them, or susceptible to one of them, or he already learned one of them, he should work himself back to the path of the good, that is the "straight path."

The "straight path" is (generally) the middle trait within each [pair of] dispositions, equidistant from each extreme. Therefore the early sages commanded that a person should constantly evaluate his dispositions, measure them, and keep them on the middle path so that he might be physically healthy (lit. complete in his body). How is this? One should not be temperamental and easily angered, nor should he be numb like a corpse. Rather, he should be moderate - not getting angry except over something important that is worth it, and then just enough to ensure it won't happen again. Similarly, he only desires the things that the body actually needs to live as the matter that it states (Proverbs 13:25), "The righteous man eats to satisfy his body" (i.e. he enjoys healthy food in moderation, neither an ascetic nor a glutton). Similarly, he should only work enough to acquire that which he needs for the moment, as the matter that it states (Psalms 37:16), "a little is good for the righteous" (i.e. neither lazy nor a workaholic), neither overly cheap nor generous. Rather he gives as much charity as he can afford and gives sensible loans to those who need. He should not be constantly jolly and joking, nor should he be sad and morose, but rather be calm and content, with a pleasant demeanor all his life, and so on for all his other dispositions. This path is the path of the sages; anyone whose dispositions are balanced may be called a sage.

One who is carefully self-reflective, and who [thus] moves himself from a moderate disposition toward one side or the other is called pious. How is this? One who moves oneself away from proud-heartedness towards the opposite extreme and attains a very lowly spirit is called pious, and this is the trait of piety. But if he moves himself only toward the middle [of the scale] and becomes humble, he is called wise, and this is the trait of wisdom. And [like] this is it with all the rest of the dispositions. The early pious ones would incline their dispositions from the middle of the scale toward one of the two extremes. There is a disposition where they would incline toward the first extreme and there is a disposition where they would incline toward the other extreme. This is going beyond what the law requires. We are commanded to walk in these intermediate paths which are good and straight, as it states (Deuteronomy 28:9), "and walk in His ways."

They taught the following explanation of this commandment: "Just as G-d is called 'Gracious,' you too must be gracious. Just as G-d is called 'Compassionate,' you too must be compassionate. Just as G-d is called 'Holy,' you too must be holy." In this way did the Prophets call G-d by many appellations: "Slow to anger," "Abundant in kindness," "Just and Fair," "Pure," "Mighty," and "Powerful," and similar to these - in order to demonstrate that these are good and proper ways and that a person is obligated to accustom himself to act according to them, to imitate G-d, according to his ability.

This is how one trains himself towards these dispositions until they become part of his personality: By constant, repetitive practice of the actions [characteristic of] moderate dispositions and drilling over and over, constantly, until these actions are easy and are no longer a burden upon him. And [these] dispositions will [then] become fixed in his personality. And since [these attributes] are names used to call the Creator and they are the middle path which we are obligated to walk, this path is called the "Path of G-d." This is what our father Abraham taught his sons, as it states (Genesis 18:19), "for I know him, so that he will command, etc." And one who follows this path brings good to himself as it states (Genesis 18:19), "in order to bring to Abraham all that He spoke of him."

People with physical illnesses taste that which is bitter as sweet and that which is sweet as bitter, and there are some sick people who desire and crave foods which are not suitable for eating, such as dirt and charcoal, and hate good foods, such as bread and meat, all in accordance with the extent of the illness. Similarly, people whose souls are sick desire and love the negative traits and hate the good path and are indolent about following it, and it is extremely heavy upon them, in accordance with their illness. And so Yishayahu states regarding these people (Isaiah 5:20), "Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that change darkness into light, and light into darkness; that change bitter into sweet, and sweet into bitter!" and about them it stated (Proverbs 2:13), "Who leave the paths of uprightness, To walk in the ways of darkness." And what is the cure for the spiritually ill? They should go to the wise, who are healers of souls, and heal their illnesses through the traits that they teach them, until they return to the path of good. And those who recognize their negative traits but do not go to the wise to cure them, about them Shlomo stated (Proverbs 1:7), "the foolish despise wisdom and discipline."

And [what] is the cure? Someone who is an angry person, he is told to conduct himself [in such a way] that if he is struck and cursed he doesn't react at all, and to follow this path for a long time, until he has uprooted the anger from his heart. And if he is arrogant, he should accustom himself to great disgrace, sitting below everyone, wearing worn-out rags which humiliate their wearer, and so on with things like this, until he has uprooted the arrogance from himself and returned to the middle path which is the good path. And when he has returned to the middle path, he should follow it all his days. And along the same line, he should do for all other dispositions: if he is far to one extreme, he should put himself far to the other extreme and accustom himself to it for a long time, until he returns to the good path which is the moderate trait for each and every disposition.

But there are dispositions within which it is forbidden for a man to follow moderation, but rather he should distance himself from one extreme to the point [of going to] the other extreme. And [one such disposition] is haughtiness, such that the good path is not that a person just be modest, but rather he should be lowly of spirit and his spirit should be very cast down. And therefore, it is stated about Moshe, our teacher (Numbers 12:3), "very humble," and it does not only state, "humble. And therefore, our sages commanded (Avot 4:4), "Be very, very, lowly of spirit." And they also said (Sotah 4b), "Anyone who is haughty is denying a fundamental principle of faith, as it stated (Deuteronomy 8:14), "And your heart become haughty and you will forget the Lord, your G-d." And they also said (Sotah 5a), "In excommunication is [placed] one who has contemptuousness, and even partially [so]." And so [too], anger is a very bad trait, and it is fitting for a person to distance himself from it to the other extreme. And [so], he should accustom himself to not get angry, and even about something that is fitting to get angry about. And if he wants to bring fear upon his children and his household - or upon the community if he is a an officer - and he wants to get angry with them in order that they return to the good, he should show himself to be angry in front of them in order to discipline them. But, privately, his mind should be calm about himself - like a man that pretends to get angry at the time of his anger, but he is [really] not angry. And the early sages said (Zohar, Bereishit 2:16) that anyone who gets angry, it is as if he worshiped idolatry. And they [also] said about anyone who gets angry (Pesachim 66b), "If he is a wise man, his wisdom withdraws from him, and if he is a prophet, his prophecy withdraws from him." And the lives of angry people are not lives. Therefore, they commanded to distance oneself from anger to the point that he accustoms himself not to feel even things that [truly should] cause anger, and this is the good path[in this case]. And the path of the righteous ones is to be insulted and not to insult, hearing their curse and not responding, doing [what they do] in love, and happy with afflictions (Yoma 23a). And about them the verse states (Judges 5:31), "but they that love Him are like the coming of the sun in its might."

A person should always be indulging in silence and only speak about a matter of wisdom or about things that are required for the life of the body. They said about Rav, the student of our holy Rabbi (Yehuda HaNassi), that he never spoke idle speech all of his days - and that is the speech of most people. And about this, the sages commanded (Yoma 19b), "One who indulges in words, brings sin." And they said (Avot 1:17), "I have not found anything good for the body except silence." And so [too] with words of Torah and words of wisdom, a person's words should be few and their content should be great. And this is what the sages commanded and said (Pesachim 3:2), "A person should always review with his students in a brief fashion." But if the words are many and the content scant, behold this is foolishness and about this it is stated (Ecclesiastes 5:2), "As a dream comes with much business and the voice of a fool with many words."

"A safeguarding fence around wisdom is silence" (Avot 3:13). Therefore one should not be quick to answer, nor indulgent in speech. And one should teach the students with tranquility and calm, without yelling and without lengthiness of speech. This is what Shlomo stated (Ecclesiastes 9:17), "The words of the wise are heard in calmness."

It is forbidden for a person to conduct himself with duplicitous and seductive words, and he should not have one thing in the mouth and [another] thing in the heart. Rather, his inside should be like his outside, and the matter that is in his heart should be the matter that is in his mouth. And it is forbidden to deceive (literally, steal the mind) of the creatures, and even to deceive the gentile. How is this? He should not sell the meat of a carcass to a gentile in place of the meat of a slaughtered animal. And he should not supplicate his fellow to eat with him when he knows that he will not eat [with him]. And he should not indulge in [the offering of] a gift when he know that [his fellow] will not accept [it]. And he should not open barrels [of wine] for him, when he needs to open them in order to sell [the wine], in order to seduce him [into thinking] that he opened them for his honor. And so [too], all similar to this. And even one word of seduction and deceit is forbidden. But rather his language should be true and his spirit should be correct and his heart should be pure from all oppression and tricks.

A person should not be a joker and prankster and not sad and morose, but rather [he should] be happy. So said the sages (Avot 3:13), "Joking and lightheartedness acclimate toward promiscuity." And they commanded that a person not be uncontrolled in joking and not sad and mournful, but rather that he greets every person with a pleasant countenance. And so [too], he should not be very acquisitive and carried away by assets and not lazy and idle from work, but rather someone with a [generous] eye - minimizing in business and involved in Torah [study]. And he should rejoice in that little that is his portion. And [he should] not be argumentative and not envious and not lustful and not chase after honor. So said the sages (Avot 4:21), "Envy, lust and honor drive a man from the world." The general principle of the matter is that he should walk in the moderate trait in each and every disposition, until all of his dispositions correspond to the middle. And this is what Shlomo stated (Proverbs 4:26), "Survey the course of your feet, and all your paths will be firm."

Lest a man were to say, "Since envy, gluttony, and honor and their ilk are a bad path, and they remove man from the world, I will avoid them as much as possible, and I will distance myself from them to the other extreme" - such that he will not eat meat, and will not drink wine, and will not marry a wife, and will not sit in a nice home, and will not wear nice clothing, rather sackcloth and hard wool and their ilk, similar to the priests of idolaters - this too is a bad path and it is prohibited to walk in it. He who walks this path is called a sinner, for it is states about the Nazirite (Numbers 6, 11), "and make atonement for him, for that he sinned by reason of the dead". The sages said (Taanit 11a), "And if the Nazirite that did not abstain from anything but wine needs atonement, he who abstains from everything - how much more so!" Therefore, the sages commanded that a man should not abstain from things other than those which the Torah prevents alone, and not to forbid the permitted things to himself through vows and oaths. Thus said the sages (Yerushalmi Nedarim 9:1), "Is it not enough for you that which the Torah has prohibited, that you prohibit yourself other things?" And included in this are the people who constantly fast; they are not on a good path, and the sages prohibited a man from tormenting himself with fasts. And with respect to all of these and there ilk, Shlomo commanded and stated (Ecclesiastes 7, 16), "Be not righteous overmuch; neither make yourself overwise; why should you destroy yourself?"

A person must direct his heart and all his actions to only know G-d, blessed be He; and it should be that his resting, his rising, and his speech all corresponding to this thing. How is this? That when he does business, or does some work to gain money, his mindset should not be merely to collect money, but to do these things so that he can get things that the body needs, food and drink, and shelter in a house, and marrying a woman. And similarly when he eats, drinks, and has sexual relations, he should not have the mindset to do these things merely for pleasure's sake, to the point that he only eats and drinks things sweet to the palate, and has relations only for pleasure. Rather, he should have the mindset that he will eat and drink only in order to keep his body and limbs healthy. Therefore, he should not eat all that his palate desires, like a dog or a donkey. Rather, he should eat things that are beneficial to the body, whether they are bitter or sweet, and he should not eat things bad for the body, even though they are sweet to the palate. How is this? One whose skin is warm should not eat meat, nor honey, nor should he drink wine, like Shlomo said by way of a proverb, (Proverbs 25:27) "Eating too much honey is not good." And one should drink endive juice, even though it is bitter. Consequently, he is drinking and eating for the purpose of health only, so that he'll be healthy, and he can remain wholesome, since it is impossible for someone to live without food and drink. And similarly, when one has sexual relations, he should only have sexual relations for bodily health, and to continue his seed. Therefore, one should not have sexual relations any time he desires it, but rather any time he knows that he needs to emit seed for health reasons or to continue [his] seed.

Someone who conducts himself according to [the dictates of] medicine - if he only puts it into his mind that his body and limbs be wholesome and that he should have children that do his work and toil for his needs, that is not a good path. But rather, he should put it into his mind that his body should be wholesome and strong, in order that his soul be upright to know G-d - as it is impossible for him to understand and observe the wisdoms when he is hungry or sick or one of his limbs hurts - and he should put it into his mind that he should have a son that will maybe become a sage and a great man in Israel. It comes out that the one who walks on this path all of his days, is always serving G-d - even during the time that he giving and taking (in business), even when he is having sexual relations - because his intention in everything is so that he finds that which he needs to the point that his body be wholesome to [best] serve G-d. And even during the time that he sleeps, if he is sleeping purposefully in order that his mind rest and his body rest so that he not get sick and [then] not be able to serve G-d when he is sick, it comes out that his sleep is service to the Omnipresent, may He be blessed. And about this matter the sages commanded and said (Avot 2:12), "All of your actions should be for the sake of Heaven." And this is what Shlomo said in his wisdom (Proverbs 3:6), "In all your paths know Him, and He will make your roads smooth."

Since the body being healthy and wholesome is from the paths of G-d - as behold, it is impossible for one to understand or to know anything of Godly wisdom when he is sick - therefore one must distance himself from things that are damaging to the body and to accustom himself to things that are healthy and therapeutic, and they are as follows: A person should always only eat when he is hungry, and drink when he is thirsty. And he should not delay his orifices even one second, but rather whenever he feels the need to urinate or defecate he should immediately get up.

A person should not eat until his belly is full, but rather he should reduce [his consumption from that by] about a quarter of his satiation. And he should only drink a little water during his meal and [it should be] mixed with wine. And when the food begins to be digested in his intestines, he should drink what he needs to drink. And he should not eat until he has checked himself very much, lest he need his orifices. A person should not eat until he walks before eating, until his body begins to warm up; or he exerts himself with another exertion. The general principle of the thing is that he should strain his body and exert himself every day in the morning until his body begins to warm up, and he should [then] be still a little until his soul composes itself and he can [then] eat. And if he bathes in hot water after he exerts himself, that is good. And afterwards, he waits a little and eats.

A person should always eat seated in his place or reclining on his left side. He shouldn't walk and he shouldn't ride and he shouldn't exert himself and he shouldn't shake his body and he shouldn't stroll until he has digested the meal in his intestines. And everyone who strolls after eating or exerts himself, behold this one bring upon himself harmful and difficult illnesses.

The day and the night [together] are twenty-four hours. It is enough for one to sleep one third of them, namely, eight hours. They should be at the end of the night-time, so that from the beginning of his falling asleep until dawn will be eight hours; and it will come out can that he will rise from his bed before the sun rises.

A person should not sleep on his face or on his back, but rather on his side. At the beginning of the night [he should sleep] on his left side and at the end of the night, he should sleep on his right side. He should not sleep close to [the time of his] eating, but rather should wait three or four hours. And he should not sleep during the day.

Things that serve as laxatives for the intestines - such as grapes, figs, mulberries, pears, melons, types of squash and types of cucumbers - a person should eat before eating [his meal]. And he should not mix them with his meal, but rather he should wait a little until they exit his upper stomach and [then] eat his meal. And things that constipate his intestines - such as pomegranates, quinces, apples, crustumenian pears - one should eat immediately after his meal, and he should not eat much of them.

When a person wants to eat chicken and beef together, he should eat the chicken first. And so [too], if he wants to eat eggs and chicken, he should eat eggs first; ovine meat and beef, he should eat the ovine meat first. A person should always eat the lighter thing first and afterwards the heavier.

In the summer, one should eat bland foods and not add much spice, and he should eat vinegar. And in the winter, he should eat hot foods and add much spice, and he should eat little mustard and Assa foetida. And in accordance with this should he act in cold [climates] and in warm [climates - eating] in each and every [climate], what is fitting for it.

There are foods that are really very bad, and it is fitting that a person never eat them, such as big old salted fish, old salted cheese, truffles and mushrooms, old salted meat, wine from the press and a food that sat until its smell wafts, and so [too] any food that has a bad smell or is very bitter. Behold, these are like a deadly poison for the body. And there are foods that are bad, but they are not as bad as the first ones. Therefore, it is fitting for a person to only eat a little of them and after many days. And a person should not accustom himself to have his meals from them or to eat them with his meals constantly. Examples [of these] are big fish, cheese or milk that sat twenty-four hours after it was [produced], meat from large bulls or large goats, fava beans, lentils, chickpeas, barley bread, matzo bread, cabbage, leeks, onions, garlic, mustard and radishes. All of these are bad foods [and] it is only fitting that a person eat a very little of them, and in the winter. But in the summer, one should not eat from them at all. And it is only fava beans and lentils that are not fitting to eat in the summer or the winter. And one may eat gourds during the summer.

And there are foods that are bad, but they are not like [those above]. And they are water-fowl, small pigeons, dates, bread baked in oil, bread kneaded in oil, fine flour that has been completely sifted to the point that the smell of bran no longer remains, fish brine and fish pickling. It is not fitting to indulge much in these foods. And a person who is wise and conquers his impulse and is not pulled in by his desire and does not eat any of those [foods] mentioned, except if they are needed for healing - behold, he is a mighty one.

A person should always prevent himself from eating the fruit of the trees. And he should [certainly] not eat much of them and even if they are dried - and it is not necessary to say if they are fresh. But before they have completely ripened, they are like swords for the body. And so [too], carobs are always bad. And all sour fruit are bad and one should only eat a little of them during the summer and in hot [climates]. And figs, grapes and almonds are always good, whether they are fresh or dry, and a person can eat of them all that he requires. But he should not eat them constantly, even though they are better than all fruit of the trees.

Honey and wine are bad for minors and good for the elderly, and all the more so in the winter. And a person should eat in the summer, two thirds of what he eats in the winter.

A person should always make efforts that his bowels should be soft all of his days and that they should be slightly close to diarrhea. And this is a general principle in medicine: all the time when feces are blocked or come out with difficulty, bad illnesses [follow]. And with what should a person soften his intestines if they are a little constipated? If he is a young man, every morning, he should eat salty boiled vegetables, seasoned with olive oil and fish brine and salt, without bread. Or he should drink the waters of the boiled spinach or cabbage in olive oil and fish brine and salt. And if he is elderly, he should drink honey mixed with water in the morning and wait about four hours and afterwards eat his meal. And he should do this one day - or three or four days if he needs to, until his intestines are healed.

And [the following] is another general principle that they said about bodily health: Any time that a person exercises and exerts himself greatly and is not satiated and his intestines are soft, sickness does not come to him and he becomes stronger - and even if he eats of the bad foods.

And anyone who sits tight and does not exercise or one who delays his orifices, or whose intestines are hard - even if he eats good foods and he guards himself according to [the dictates of] medicine - all of his days will be [full of] ailments and he will become weak. And gluttonous eating is like a deadly poison for every person and it is the essence of all the sicknesses. And most sicknesses that come to a person are only because of bad foods or because he fills his stomach and engages in gluttonous eating, even if it is of good foods. And this is what Shlomo stated (Proverbs 21:23), "He who guards his mouth and tongue, guards his soul from troubles" - which is to say, he guards his mouth from eating a bad food or from satiation, and his tongue from speaking anything except for his needs.

The way of bathing is that a person should enter the bathhouse every seven days. And he should not enter close to his eating and not when he is hungry, but rather when the food begins to be digested. And he should wash his entire body in hot water that does not scald the body. And [he should wash] only his head with hot water that scald the body. And afterwards, he should wash his body with lukewarm water, and afterwards in very lukewarm water until he washes in cold water. Neither lukewarm water nor cold water should get on his head, and he should not bathe with cold water in the winter. And he should not bathe until his whole body perspires and is massaged. He should not tarry in the bathhouse, but rather when his whole body has perspired and been massaged, he should rinse himself and leave. And he should check himself before he enters the bathhouse and after he leaves, lest he needs to [take care of] his orifices. And so [too], a person should check himself always before eating and after eating; before sexual relations and after sexual relations; before he exerts himself and exercises and after he exerts himself and exercises; before he sleeps and after he sleeps. And the amount of all [of these] is ten.

When a person leaves the bathhouse, he should put on his clothes and cover his head in the outer room, in order that cold winds don't affect him [adversely]. And even in the summer, he needs to be careful. And he should delay after he comes out until his soul is tranquil and his body is rested and the heat goes away, and afterwards he may eat. And if he sleeps a little when he goes out of the bathhouse before eating, behold, it is very good. And he should not drink cold water when he goes out of he bathhouse, and it is not necessary to say that he should not drink in the bath. And if he is thirsty when he comes out of the bathhouse and he cannot prevent himself, he should mix the water with wine or with honey and drink [it]. And if he anoints [himself] with oil in the bathhouse in the winter after he rinses himself, behold, that is good.

A person should not accustom himself to constantly letting blood, and he should only let blood when he needs to greatly. And he should not let blood in the summer and not in the winter, but rather a little in the days of Nissan and a little in the days of Tishrei. And from after he is fifty years old, he should not let blood at all. And a person should not let blood and go into the bathhouse on that day; and he should not let blood and go on the road, and not [do so] when he comes back from the road. And he should eat and drink less than that to which he is accustomed on the day of the bloodletting. And he should rest on the day of the bloodletting and not exert himself and not exercise and not stroll.

Semen is the strength of the body and its life and the light of the eyes. And the more it comes out, the more the body withers and its strength withers and his life is dissipated. This is what Shlomo said in his wisdom (Proverbs 31:3), "Do not give your force to women." Anyone who is relentless in sexual relations has old age come to him suddenly, and his power weakens and his eyes dim; and a bad smell wafts from his mouth and from his armpit; and the hair on his head and his eyebrows and eye lashes shed, and the hair of his beard and armpit and the hair on his legs multiply; and his teeth fall out; and may other pains besides these come to him. The medical sages said [that] one out of a thousand dies from other sicknesses and the thousand from too much intercourse. Hence, a person should be careful about this if he wants to live well, and only have sexual relations when his body is healthy and very strong and he has frequent involuntary erections, [and even] when he puts his mind to something else, the erection continues, and he finds heaviness in his loins and below and it is as if the vas deferens is taut and his flesh is hot. Such [a one] needs to have sexual relations and it is medicinal for him to have sexual relations. A person should not have sexual relations when he is satiated and not when he is hungry, but rather after the food in his intestines has been digested. And he should check his orifices before sexual relations and after sexual relations. And he should not have sexual relations standing up or sitting down, nor in a bathhouse, and not [even] on a day when he goes to the bathhouse; and [also] not on a day of bloodletting; and not on a day when he goes out on the road or when he comes back from the road - not before them and not after them.

I guarantee that anyone who conducts himself in these ways that we have taught will not come to sickness all the days of his life until he grows very old and dies and [that] he does not need a physician. And his body will be wholesome and stand healthy all of his days, unless his body is badly constituted from the beginning of his creation; or he was accustomed to one of the bad habits from the beginning of his birth; or if there should come a plague of pestilence or a plague of a famine to the world.

All of these practices that we have stated are only appropriate for a healthy person. But for a sick person or someone who has a sick limb or has engaged in a bad practice for many years, there are other ways and practices for each one according to the sickness, as are elucidated in the book of medicine. And a change in habit [otherwise] is the beginning of sickness.

In any place that does not have a physician, it is not fitting for the healthy or the sick to budge from these ways that have been stated in this chapter - since every one of them brings good in the end.

A Torah scholar is not permitted to live in any city which does not have the following ten things in it. And they are as follows: A physician, a blood-letter, a bathhouse, a toilet, an available water supply such as a river or spring, a synagogue, a teacher of small children, a scribe, an officer of charity collections and a court that administers corporal punishment and incarcerates.

Just as a wise man is recognizable by his wisdom and dispositions, and distinguished by them from the rest of the people, so [too] does he need to be recognizable in his eating, in his drinking, in his sexual relations, in his taking care of his needs, in his speech, in his walking, in his clothing, in the maintenance of his things, and in his business dealings. And all of these activities should be especially nice and proper. How is this? A Torah scholar should not be a glutton, but should eat food that is fitting for his body's health. And he should not overeat of it. And he should not run after stuffing his belly like those who stuff themselves with food and drink until their stomachs burst. And about them it is explicit in the tradition, "and I will spread dung upon your faces" (Malachi 2:3). The sages said (Shabbat 151a) that these are people who eat and drink and make all of their days like holidays. And they are the ones that say, "Eat and drink, for tomorrow we die." And this is the eating of the wicked. And these tables are the ones that Scripture condemned and said, "As all tables are filled with vomit and filth, with no space" (Isaiah 28:8). But the wise man only eats one or two dishes and eats of it enough for his living and that is enough for him. This is what Solomon meant by "A righteous one eats to satisfy his soul" (Proverbs 13:25).

When a wise person eats the little that is appropriate for him, he should only dine in his home, at his table. And he should only eat in a shop or in the marketplace because of a great need, so that he not be degraded in front of [the people]. And he should not dine with ignoramuses, nor at those tables which are "full of filth and vomit." And he should not have many meals all over the place, even together with the wise, nor should he eat at meals which have large gatherings. And it's only appropriate for him to eat at a meal [outside of his home] that is related to a commandment, such as an engagement or wedding feast, and that is when a Torah scholar is marrying the daughter of [another] Torah scholar. And the early righteous and pious people did not eat from any meal which was not theirs.

When the wise man drinks wine, he only drinks in order to moisturize the food in his intestines. And anyone who gets drunk - behold, he is a sinner and degraded and loses his wisdom. And if he gets drunk before ignoramuses, behold, he has profaned the name [of G-d]. And it is prohibited to drink wine in the afternoon - even a little - unless it was part of the [meal]; for drinking as part of the [meal] does not get one drunk, and [so] we are only warned about wine that [comes] after the meal.

Even though a man's wife is always permitted to him, it is fitting for a Torah scholar to conduct himself with sanctity and not be found with his wife [constantly] like a rooster, but rather [he should limit his conjugal relations with his wife] from [one] Shabbat evening to [another] Shabbat evening (once a week) if he has the strength. And when he speaks with her, he should not speak at the beginning of the night when he is satiated and his belly is full, and not at the end of the night when he is hungry, but rather in the middle of the night when the food in his intestines has been digested. He should not be excessively lightheaded with her and he should not make his mouth vulgar with meaningless words - and even between him and her [alone]. Behold, it is stated in the words of tradition (Amos 4:13), "and He tells a man his conversation." The sages said (Chagigah 5b), "Even for a light conversation between a man and his wife will he have to account in the future." And the two of them should not be drunk and not listless and not agitated - and not [even] one of them. And she should not be asleep, and he should not force her when she does not want, but rather it should be the wish of both of them and in their joy. He should speak and laugh with her a little, in order to calm her soul, and [then] he should have sexual relations with embarrassment - and not with brazenness - and he should separate immediately.

It is not enough that anyone who conducts himself according to this practice will sanctify his soul and purify himself and improve his dispositions, but [also] if he has children, they will be pleasant and bashful, fitting for wisdom and for piety. And anyone who conducts himself according to the practices of the rest of the people that walk in darkness, will have his children be like those people.

Torah scholars conduct themselves with great modesty. They do not disgrace themselves and do not reveal their heads nor their bodies. And even at the time that he goes to the toilet, he is modest and he does not remove his clothing until he sits. And he does not wipe with his right hand. And he distances himself [at that time] from all people, and he enters to a room behind a room, a cave behind a cave and relieves himself. If he relieves himself behind a fence, he should distance himself in order that his fellow should not hear the sound if he passes gas. And if he relieves himself in a valley, he should distance himself in order that [his fellow] should not see him reveal himself. And he should not speak when he relieves himself, even for a great need. And in the way that he practices modesty during the day, so should he practice [it] at night. And a person should always teach himself to relieve himself only in the morning and in the evening [when few people are out], so that he not [need to] go far away.

A Torah scholar should not shout and scream while he speaks, like animals and beasts. And he should not raise his voice excessively. Rather, he should speak pleasantly with all [people]. But in speaking pleasantly, he should be careful not to distance himself [from his interlocutor], such that he appears [to speak] like a haughty person. And he should be the first to greet all people so that they derive pleasure from him. And he should judge every person favorably, recount the praises of his fellow and never his disgrace, love peace and pursue peace. If he sees that his words are constructive and will be heard, he should speak; and if not, he should remain silent. How is this? He should not [attempt to] appease his fellow in the moment of his anger, nor question him about his vow at the time that he made it, [rather he should wait] until his mind has cooled down and he is calm, and he should not console him while the deceased lies before him, because he is agitated until he has buried [the deceased]. And so on for all similar situations. And he should not look upon his fellow in the hour of his ruin, rather he should avert his eyes from him. And he should not distort [the reality] with his speech, not adding and not subtracting [from the truth], except in words of peace and the like. The principle of the matter is [that] he should only speak words of wisdom or kindness and things like them. And he should not converse with a woman in the marketplace, even if she is his wife or his sister or his daughter.

A Torah scholar should not walk with a (completely) upright posture and with an outstretched neck, as the matter that is stated (Isaiah 3:16), "and walk with outstretched necks and with roving eyes." And he should not walk with the heel next to the toe - nonchalantly - like women and haughty ones, as it states (Isaiah 3:16), "and walking with a mincing gait, making a tinkling with their feet.” And he should not run in a public area, like the custom of the crazy ones. And he should not bend his posture, like those with a hunchback. Rather, he should look down as if he were standing in prayer. And he should walk in the marketplace like a man who is absorbed by his affairs. Even in a person's walk, it is recognizable if he is a wise and intelligent person or an imbecile and a fool. And so did Shlomo say in his wisdom (Ecclesiastes 10:3), "And also on the way, when the fool walks, his mind is lacking; and he says to all that he is a fool" - he informs all about himself, that he is a fool.

The clothing of a Torah scholar should be pleasant and clean. And it is forbidden that there be found a strain or grease or the like on his garment. And he should not wear the clothes of kings - for example, garments of gold and purple that all stare at - nor the clothes of the poor that disgrace their wearer, but rather pleasant mid-level garments. And his flesh should not be visible under his garb like [with] the excessively light linen garments that they make in Egypt. And his garments should not drag on the ground like the garments of the haughty, but rather [they should descend] to his heel, and his sleeve [should extend] to the tips of his fingers. And his cloak should not be hiked down - because it appears like haughtiness - except only on Shabbat, if he does not have [another special cloak] to change [into]. And he should not wear patched shoes - patches on top of patches - in the winter. However, in the summer it is permitted, if he was poor. He should not be perfumed when he walks into the marketplace and not [walk there] with perfumed clothing, and he should not put perfume into his hair. However, if he anointed his flesh with perfume to remove the stench, it is permissible. And so [too], he should not go out alone at night, unless he had a set time to go out to his studies. All of [the latter] are [in order to avoid causing] suspicion [of immoral behavior].

A Torah scholar finances his matters orderly. He eats and drinks and feeds the people of his household according to his money and his success, and he does not overburden himself. The sages commanded about the way of the world (Chullin 84a), that a person should only eat meat from desire, as it states (Deuteronomy 12:20), "since your soul desires to eat meat." It is enough for the healthy person to eat meat from [one] Shabbat eve to [another] Shabbat eve (once a week). And if he is rich in order that he can [afford to] eat meat every day, he should eat [it every day]. The rabbis commanded and said (Chullin 84b), [that] a person should always eat less than befits him according to his money, dress as befits him and honor his wife and children more than befits him.

The way of intelligent people is that a man should first establish an occupation that will support him, and after that buy a home, and after that marry a woman, as it states (Deuteronomy 20:6), "What man is there that planted a vineyard, and has not used the fruit thereof?"; (Deuteronomy 20:5) "What man is there that has built a new house, and has not dedicated it?"; (Deuteronomy 20:6) "What man is there that has betrothed a wife, and has not taken her?" But the foolish begin with marrying a woman, and after that, if he can afford it, he buys a house, and after that, at the end of his life, he will turn around and seek out a trade or will support himself from charity. And similarly it said among the curses (Deuteronomy 28:30), "You shall betroth a wife[...] you shall build a house[...] you shall plant a vineyard," which is to say, your deeds shall be backwards so that your ways will not be successful. But in the blessing it says (I Samuel 18:14), "And David was discerning in all his ways; and the Lord was with him."

And it is forbidden for a person to abandon or consecrate all of his property and become a burden on the creatures. And he should not sell his field [in order to] buy a house, and not a house [in order to] buy movable goods or to do business with the money from [the sale of] his house. But [rather], he should sell his movable goods and buy a field. The general principle of the matter is that he make a strategy for the success of his property and exchange the non-durable for the durable. His intention should not be to derive a small temporary benefit or to benefit a little and lose much.

A Torah scholar must conduct his negotiations with truth and faith. He says no [when it is] no, and yes [when it is] yes. He is exacting with himself in accounts, and giving and ceding to others when he buys from them - and he does not get exacting with them. And he gives the money for the purchase immediately. And he must not be a guarantor, and not an intermediary for a loan, and not come as the collector [for someone else's loan]. He (does not) obligates himself in commerce when the Torah has not obligated him, so that he fulfill his word and not change it. And if others owed him according to the law, he should be patient and forgive them, and lend and give grace. And he should not [compete with his fellow in business], and never cause anguish to any man in the world as long as he lives. The general principle of the matter is to be one of the pursued and not one of the pursuers, one of the offended, and not one of the offenders. And about a person who does all of these actions and those similar to them, Scripture says about him (Isaiah 49, 3), "And He said to me, 'You are My servant, Israel, in whom I will be glorified.'".

It is human nature to be attracted to the ideas and actions of one's neighbors and friends and to follow the customs of the people of his land. Therefore, a person needs to bind himself to the righteous and always dwell in the midst of the wise in order that he might learn from their deeds and keep far from the evil ones who walk in darkness so as not to learn from their deeds. This is what Shlomo says (Proverbs 13:20), "He who walks with the wise becomes wise and he who befriends fools will suffer." And it states, (Psalms 1:1), "Happy is the man [who has not followed the advice of the wicked)." And thus, if one lives in a land whose customs are evil and people do not follow a straight path, one should go to a land where the people are righteous and are accustomed to following a good path. And if all the lands that he knows and hears reports of are accustomed to follow a path that is not good, like our time, or he is not able to go to a land the customs of which are good, because of troops or health, he should remain alone by himself, as it says, "Sit alone and be silent" (Lamentations 3:28). If they are evil and sinful people and do not allow him to stay there in the land unless he mixes among them and follows their evil ways, he should go out to caves, thickets and deserts. And let him not accustom himself to the way of the sinners, as it says, "Who will give me in the wilderness, a lodging for guests" (Jeremiah 9:1).

It is a positive commandment to cleave to the sages and their students in order to learn from their deeds, as the matter that is stated (Deuteronomy 10:20), "and to Him cleave" - and is it possible for a person to cleave to the Divine Presence? Rather thus said the sages about the explanation of this commandment (Ketuvot 111b) - cleave to the sages and their students. Therefore a person must try to marry the daughter of a Torah scholar and to marry his daughter off to a Torah scholar and to eat and drink with Torah scholars and to do business with Torah scholars and to take part with them in all manner of activities, as it states (Deuteronomy 10:22) "and to cleave to Him." And so too the sages commanded and said (Avot 1:4), "Become dirty in the dust of their feet and drink their words thirstily."

It is a commandment upon every person to love each and every Jew as himself, as it is stated, "You shall love your neighbor as yourself" (Leviticus 19:18). Therefore one needs to speak praises of [the other] and to be as careful with his money as one is with one's own money and [as one] desires his own honor. Whoever gains honor through the disgrace of his fellow has no portion in the world to come.

The loving of a convert who came and entered under the wings of the Divine Presence is [comprised of] two positive commandments - one because he is included in "neighbors" [and we must love our neighbor as ourselves], and one because he is a convert and the Torah stated (Deuteronomy 10:19), "And you shall love the convert." [G-d] commanded regarding the love of the convert like He commanded regarding the loving of Himself, as it stated (Deuteronomy 6:5), "And you shall love the Lord, your G-d." The Holy One, Blessed be He, Himself loves converts, as it is stated (Deuteronomy 10:18), "and loves the stranger."

Anyone who hates one from Israel in his heart transgresses a negative commandment, as it states, "You shall not hate your brother in your heart" (Leviticus 19:17). We do not give lashes for this negative commandment because there is no act [involved] in it. The Torah warns only about hating in one's heart, but one who strikes one's fellow or insults him - even though it is not permissible - does not transgress on account of "you shall not hate."

When one person sins against [another, the latter] should not despise him and be silent, as it states concerning the wicked ones, "And Avshalom did not speak to Amonon, neither bad nor good because Avshalom hated Amnon" (II Samuel 13:22). Rather, it is a commandment to inform him and say to him, "Why did you do this and that to me? And why did you wrong me in matter x?" As it states, "you shall surely rebuke your kinsman" (Leviticus 19:17). And if he returns and asks that he forgives him, he needs to forgive. And the one forgiving should not be cruel as it states, "And Abraham prayed to G-d" (Genesis 20:17).

[Regarding] one who sees his fellow sin or follow a path that is not good, it is a commandment to bring him back to the good and to inform him that he is sinning against himself with his wicked deeds, as it states, "you shall surely rebuke your kinsman" (Leviticus 19:17). One who rebukes his fellow - whether over matters that are between him and his fellow or matters between him and the Omnipresent - needs to rebuke him privately and speak to him calmly and in a soft tone and inform him that he is only speaking to him for his [own] good, to bring him to the life of the world to come. If he accepts [the rebuke] from him, it is good. And if he does not, he should rebuke him a second time and a third. Thus a person is always obligated to rebuke him until the sinner strikes him and says "I will not listen." Anyone that has the possibility to rebuke and does not rebuke - he is caught in that sin, because he had the possibility to rebuke [him] about them.

At first, one who rebukes his fellow should not speak harshly to him until he becomes embarrassed, as it says, "and you shall not bear a sin because of him" (Leviticus 19:17). Thus our sages said (Arakhin 16b), "Is it possible that you can rebuke him and his face changes [color]? [Hence] we learn to say, 'and you shall not bear a sin because of him.'" From here, [we learn that] it is forbidden for a person to embarrass a Jew, and even more so in public. Even if one who embarrasses his fellow is not lashed for it, it is [still] a great sin. Thus our sages say (Sanhedrin 107a), "One who whitens the face of his fellow in public does not have a share in the world to come." Therefore a person needs to be careful not to embarrass his fellow in public, whether [the one he rebukes] is lesser or greater, He should not call him a name that causes him shame, nor tell a story that causes him shame. To what do these words apply? To matters that are between him and his fellow. But regarding heavenly matters, if he does not repent [after being rebuked] in private, we embarrass him in public and publicize his sin and insult him to his face. And we scorn and curse him until he returns to the good, as did all the prophets in Israel.

One who has been wronged by his fellow and does not want to rebuke him and [does] not [want] to speak to him [about it] at all - because the sinner was exceedingly pedestrian or because his mind was confused - and forgives him in his heart and does not despise him and does not rebuke him; behold, this is the trait of piety. [This is so, since] the Torah was only exacting about the despising.

An individual is obligated to be careful concerning orphans and widows since their souls are very lowly and their spirits are cast down, even though they may be wealthy. And we are warned even about the widow of a king and his orphans, as it states (Exodus 22:21), "You shall not oppress any widow or orphan." And how do we behave towards them? One should only speak in soft tones to them and he should only treat them in a respectful way; he should not hurt their bodies with work, or their hearts with harsh things. And he should be more careful with their money than he is with his own money. Anyone who annoys them or angers them or pains them or oppresses them or wastes their money - behold, such a one transgresses a negative commandment. And all the more so, one who hits them or curses them. And even though we do not give lashes for this negative commandment, its punishment is explicit in the Torah (Exodus 22:23), "And My anger shall blaze forth and I will kill you with the sword." The One Who spoke and the world came into being made a covenant with them that anytime they cry out from wrongdoing, they are answered, as it states (Exodus 22:22), "as if he surely cries out to Me, I will surely hear his cry." To what do these words apply? When he afflicts them for his own need. But if a master afflicts them to teach them Torah or a craft or to lead them in the right path - behold, this is permissible. And nonetheless, he should not treat them according to [how he] treats all people, but rather make a distinction for them and handle them gently and with great mercy and respect, as it states (Proverbs 22:23), "For the Lord will fight their fight." It is the same, [whether] it is an orphan from the father or from the mother. And until when are they called orphans concerning this matter? Until they do not need an adult to rely upon and to foster them and to take care of them, but rather [the orphan] can do all of his needs by himself, like all adults.

One who spies on his fellow transgresses a negative commandment, as it states (Leviticus 19:27), "Do not go talebearing among your people." And even though we do not give lashes on the thing, it is a great transgression and it causes the killing of many souls in Israel. Therefore, it is adjacent [in the same verse] to, "do not stand upon the blood of your neighbor." Go out and learn [this] from that which happened to Deog the Edomite.

Who is a talebearer (rachil)? One who carries things and goes from one to another and says, "So did x say, such and such did I hear about x." Even though it is the truth, he destroys the world. There is a much greater sin than this - and it is included in this negative commandment - and that is evil speech (lashon hara). And that is the one who speaks disparagingly about his fellow, even though it is true. But one who speaks falsely is called the producer of a bad reputation (motzi shem ra) about his fellow. But about this master of evil speech that sits and says, "X did so and so; so and so were his ancestors; so and so did I hear about him," and says disparaging things - about this one, the verse states (Psalms 12:4), "May the Lord cut off all flattering lips, every tongue that speaks arrogance."

The sages said (Yerushalmi Peah 1:1) there are three sins [for which] people are punished in this world and have no share in the world to come: Idolatry, forbidden sexual relations and bloodshed. And evil speech is equal to them all. And the sages also said (Yerushalmi Peah 1:1) that anyone who speaks evil speech is a heretic, as it states (Psalms 12:5), "They say, 'By our tongues we shall prevail; with lips such as ours, who can be our master?'” And the sages also said (Arakhin 15b) [that] evil speech kills three people: The person who said it, the person who hears it, and the person who it was said about. And the person who hears it more so than the person who says it.

There are things that are derivatives (literally, dust) of evil speech. How is this? [One who says,] "Who will tell x that he should [continue] to be like he is now"; or "Be quiet about x, I don't want to tell what happened and what was [with him]"; and similar to these matters. And any one who speaks positively about his fellow in front of [the latter's] enemies, behold this [too] is a derivative of evil speech, as this one is causing [these enemies] to speak disparagingly about [the one he spoke abut]. And in this fashion, Shlomo said (Proverbs 27:14), "One who blesses his companion loudly in the early morning, it will be a considered a curse for him," as from his benefit will come his injury. And so [too], one who speaks evil speech in the way of joking and lightheadedness, meaning to say that he does not speak with hatred. That is what Shlomo said in his wisdom (Proverbs 26:18-19), "Like a madman shooting firebrands, arrows and death, [...] and says, 'was I was not joking.'” And so [too], one who speaks evil speech in the way of deceit - and that is when he speaks innocently, as if he did not know that this thing that he spoke is evil speech. But rather, when he is rebuked about it, he says, I did not know that this thing is evil speech," or "that such were the actions of x."

It is the same whether one speaks evil speech in front of his fellow (the subject of the evil speech) or not in front of him. And one who recounts things that, if they will be heard, cause damage to his fellow - to his body or to his property - or even will [just] upset him or frighten him; behold, this is evil speech. And if it said in front of three [listeners], the matter is already heard and [considered] known. And [so,] if one of the three recounts the thing another time, there is no evil speech in this - and that is when he does not intend to amplify it and reveal it more.

All of these are masters of evil speech, such that it is forbidden to live in their neighborhood and - all the more so - to sit with them and hear their words. And the decree on our forefathers in the wilderness was only decreed because of evil speech alone.

One who takes revenge against his fellow transgresses a negative commandment, as it states (Deuteronomy 19:18), "Do not take revenge." And even though he is not given lashes, it is a very evil disposition. Rather, it is fitting that a person be indulgent above his instincts about all matters of the world - as to those that understand, they are all matters of vanity and emptiness and it is not worthwhile to take revenge for them. What is revenge? His fellow said to him, "Lend me your hatchet." He said [back] to him, "I will not lend [it] to you." The next day, [the fellow] needs to borrow from him: His fellow said to him, "Lend me your hatchet." He said [back] to him, "I will not lend to you, the [same] way you did not lend to me when I asked you." Behold, that is taking revenge. Rather, when [his fellow] comes to borrow, he should give it to him with a full heart, and not treat him like [the other] treated him. And so [too], all that is similar to these. And so did David say in his good characteristics (Psalms 7:5), "If I have dealt evil to my ally; and I who rescued, etc."

And so [too], anyone who begrudges one from Israel transgresses a negative commandment, as it states (Leviticus 19:18), "and do not begrudge the children of your people." What is a grudge? Reuven said to Shimon, "Rent me this house" or "Lend me this ox," and Shimon did not want. Some days [later] Shimon comes to Reuven to borrow [something] form him or to rent [something] from him, and Reuven said to him, "Here you are - I am lending you and I am not like you. I will not pay you [back] according to your deeds." One who does like this transgresses against "do not begrudge." But rather, he should erase the matter from his heart and not begrudge him, as all the while that he begrudges the thing and remembers it, he may came to take revenge. Therefore the Torah was exacting about a grudge until he erases the iniquity from his heart and not remember it at all. And this is the correct disposition that allows that civilization be possible through it - and [also] commerce of people, one with the other.