Marriage Chapter 10

הָאֲרוּסָה אֲסוּרָה לְבַעְלָהּ מִדִּבְרֵי סוֹפְרִים כָּל זְמַן שֶׁהִיא בְּבֵית אָבִיהָ. וְהַבָּא עַל אֲרוּסָתוֹ בְּבֵית חָמִיו מַכִּין אוֹתוֹ מַכַּת מַרְדּוּת. וַאֲפִלּוּ אִם קִדְּשָׁהּ בְּבִיאָה אָסוּר לוֹ לָבוֹא עָלֶיהָ בִּיאָה שְׁנִיָּה בְּבֵית אָבִיהָ עַד שֶׁיָּבִיא אוֹתָהּ לְתוֹךְ בֵּיתוֹ וְיִתְיַחֵד עִמָּהּ וְיַפְרִישֶׁנָּהּ לוֹ. וְיִחוּד זֶה הוּא הַנִּקְרָא כְּנִיסָה לַחֻפָּה וְהוּא הַנִּקְרָא נִשּׂוּאִין בְּכָל מָקוֹם. וְהַבָּא עַל אֲרוּסָתוֹ לְשֵׁם נִשּׂוּאִין אַחַר שֶׁקִּדְּשָׁהּ מִשֶּׁיְּעָרֶה בָּהּ קְנָאָהּ וְנַעֲשֵׂית נְשׂוּאָה וַהֲרֵי הִיא אִשְׁתּוֹ לְכָל דָּבָר:

An engaged woman (arusa) is forbidden to her husband by rabbinic law so long as she is in her father's house. He [the husband] who sleeps with his fiancee in his father-in-law's house is lashed for rebellion (against rabbinic decrees). Even if he engaged her (kiddushin) through sexual intercourse, he is nevertheless forbidden from sleeping with her in her father's house until he brings her into his house and is alone with her and separates her for himself. This seclusion is the stage of "chuppa" and it is "nisuin" for all intents and purposes. One who sleeps with his finacee for the sake of nisuin after kiddushin is married to her in all regards after the initial stage of intercourse (penetration).

כֵּיוָן שֶׁנִּכְנְסָה הָאֲרוּסָה לַחֻפָּה הֲרֵי זוֹ מֻתֶּרֶת לָבֹא עָלֶיהָ בְּכָל עֵת שֶׁיִּרְצֶה וַהֲרֵי הִיא אִשְׁתּוֹ גְּמוּרָה לְכָל דָּבָר. וּמִשֶּׁתִּכָּנֵס לַחֻפָּה נִקְרֵאת נְשׂוּאָה אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁלֹּא נִבְעֲלָה וְהוּא שֶׁתִּהְיֶה רְאוּיָה לִבְעִילָה. אֲבָל אִם הָיְתָה נִדָּה אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁנִּכְנְסָה לַחֻפָּה וְנִתְיַחֵד עִמָּהּ לֹא גָּמְרוּ הַנִּשּׂוּאִין וַהֲרֵי הִיא כַּאֲרוּסָה עֲדַיִן:

Once an arusah has entered the chuppah, her husband is allowed to have relations with her at any time he desires, and she is considered to be his wife with regard to all matters. Once she enters the chuppah, she is called a nesu'ah, although [the couple] has not engaged in sexual relations. [The above applies when] it is fitting to engage in relations with the woman. If, however, the woman is in the niddah state [when relations are forbidden], the marriage bond is not completed and she is still considered to be an arusah although she entered the chuppah and remained in privacy [with her husband].

וְצָרִיךְ לְבָרֵךְ בִּרְכַּת חֲתָנִים בְּבֵית הֶחָתָן קֹדֶם הַנִּשּׂוּאִין וְהֵן שֵׁשׁ בְּרָכוֹת וְאֵלּוּ הֵן. בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם שֶׁהַכּל בָּרָא לִכְבוֹדוֹ. בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם יוֹצֵר הָאָדָם. בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם אֲשֶׁר יָצַר אֶת הָאָדָם בְּצַלְמוֹ בְּצֶלֶם דְּמוּת תַּבְנִיתוֹ וְהִתְקִין לוֹ מִמֶּנּוּ בִּנְיַן עֲדֵי עַד בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' יוֹצֵר הָאָדָם. שׂוֹשׂ תָּשִׂישׂ וְתָגֵל עֲקָרָה בְּקִבּוּץ בָּנֶיהָ לְתוֹכָהּ בְּשִׂמְחָה בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' מְשַׂמֵּחַ צִיּוֹן בְּבָנֶיהָ. שַׂמֵּחַ תְּשַׂמַּח רֵעִים הָאֲהוּבִים כְּשַׂמֵּחֲךָ יְצִירְךָ בְּגַן עֵדֶן מִקֶּדֶם בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' מְשַׂמֵּחַ חָתָן וְכַלָּה. בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' אֱלֹהֵינוּ מֶלֶךְ הָעוֹלָם אֲשֶׁר בָּרָא שָׂשׂוֹן וְשִׂמְחָה חָתָן וְכַלָּה גִּילָה רִנָּה דִּיצָה וְחֶדְוָה אַהֲבָה אַחֲוָה שָׁלוֹם וְרֵעוּת מְהֵרָה ה' אֱלֹהֵינוּ יִשָּׁמַע בְּעָרֵי יְהוּדָה וּבְחוּצוֹת יְרוּשָׁלַיִם קוֹל שָׂשׂוֹן קוֹל שִׂמְחָה קוֹל חָתָן קוֹל כַּלָּה קוֹל מִצְהֲלוֹת חֲתָנִים מֵחֻפָּתָם וּנְעָרִים מִמִּשְׁתֵּה מַנְגִּינָתָם בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה' מְשַׂמֵּחַ הֶחָתָן עִם הַכַּלָּה:

The marriage blessings must be recited in the groom's home before the marriage takes place. There are six blessings; they are: Blessed are You, G-d, our Lord, King of the universe, who has created all things for His glory. Blessed are You, G-d, our Lord, King of the universe, Creator of man. Blessed are You, G-d, our Lord, King of the universe, who created man in His image, in an image reflecting His likeness; [He brought forth] his form and prepared for him from His own Self a structure that will last for all time. Blessed are You, G-d, Creator of man. May the barren one rejoice and exult as her children are gathered to her with joy. Blessed are You, G-d, who makes Zion rejoice in her children. Grant joy to these loving companions, as You granted joy to Your creation in the Garden of Eden long ago. Blessed are You, G-d, who grants joy to the groom and the bride. Blessed are You, G-d, our Lord, King of the universe, who created joy and happiness, bride and groom, gladness, song, cheer and delight, love and harmony, peace and friendship. Soon, G-d, our Lord, may there be heard in the cities of Judah and the outskirts of Jerusalem, a voice of joy and a voice of happiness, a voice of a groom and a voice of a bride, a voice of grooms rejoicing from their wedding canopies and youths from their songfests. Blessed are You, G-d, who grants joy to the groom together with the bride.

וְאִם הָיָה שָׁם יַיִן מֵבִיא כּוֹס שֶׁל יַיִן וּמְבָרֵךְ עַל הַיַּיִן תְּחִלָּה וּמְסַדֵּר אֶת כֻּלָּן עַל הַכּוֹס וְנִמְצָא מְבָרֵךְ שֶׁבַע בְּרָכוֹת. וְיֵשׁ מְקוֹמוֹת שֶׁנָּהֲגוּ לְהָבִיא הֲדַס עִם הַיַּיִן וּמְבָרֵךְ עַל הַהֲדַס אַחַר הַיַּיִן וְאַחַר כָּךְ מְבָרֵךְ הַשֵּׁשׁ:

If wine is available, a cup of wine should be brought, and the blessing over wine recited first. Afterwards, all the above blessings should be recited over the cup of wine; thus, one recites seven blessings. In certain places, it is customary to bring a myrtle [branch] together with the wine. The blessing over the myrtle is recited after [the blessing over] the wine, and then the six blessings [mentioned above] are recited.

וְאֵין מְבָרְכִין בִּרְכַּת חֲתָנִים אֶלָּא בַּעֲשָׂרָה גְּדוֹלִים וּבְנֵי חוֹרִין וְחָתָן מִן הַמִּנְיָן:

The wedding blessings are recited only in the presence of a quorum of ten adult free men. The groom is counted as part of the quorum.

הַמְאָרֵס אֶת הָאִשָּׁה וּבֵרֵךְ בִּרְכַּת חֲתָנִים וְלֹא נִתְיַחֵד עִמָּהּ בְּבֵיתוֹ עֲדַיִן אֲרוּסָה הִיא שֶׁאֵין בִּרְכַּת חֲתָנִים עוֹשָׂה הַנִּשּׂוּאִין אֶלָּא כְּנִיסָה לַחֻפָּה. אֵרֵס וְכָנַס לַחֻפָּה וְלֹא בֵּרֵךְ בִּרְכַּת חֲתָנִים הֲרֵי זוֹ נְשׂוּאָה גְּמוּרָה וְחוֹזֵר וּמְבָרֵךְ אֲפִלּוּ אַחַר כַּמָּה יָמִים. וְלֹא תִּנָּשֵׂא נִדָּה עַד שֶׁתִּטְהַר. וְאֵין מְבָרְכִין לָהּ בִּרְכַּת חֲתָנִים עַד שֶׁתִּטְהַר. וְאִם עָבַר וְנָשָׂא וּבֵרֵךְ אֵינוֹ חוֹזֵר וּמְבָרֵךְ:

When a man consecrates a woman, recites the wedding blessings, but does not enter into privacy with her in his home, she is still considered to be [merely] an arusah. For nisu'in are not established by the recitation of the wedding blessings, but rather by [the couple's] entry into the chuppah. When [a man] consecrates [a woman] and [the two] enter a chuppah, but do not have the wedding blessings recited, the woman is considered to be married with regard to all matters. The wedding blessings may be recited even after several days have passed. A woman in the niddah state should not marry until she is purified. The marriage blessings are not recited for her until she is purified. If a person transgresses, marries [a woman in this state] and has the blessings recited, they should not be recited again afterwards.

וְצָרִיךְ לִכְתֹּב כְּתֻבָּה קֹדֶם כְּנִיסָה לַחֻפָּה וְאַחַר כָּךְ יִהְיֶה מֻתָּר בְּאִשְׁתּוֹ וְהֶחָתָן נוֹתֵן שְׂכַר הַסּוֹפֵר. וְכַמָּה הוּא כּוֹתֵב לָהּ. אִם הָיְתָה בְּתוּלָה אֵין כּוֹתְבִין לָהּ פָּחוֹת מִמָּאתַיִם דִּינָרִים וְאִם בְּעוּלָה אֵין כּוֹתְבִין לָהּ פָּחוֹת מִמֵּאָה דִּינָרִים [ד.] וְזֶה הוּא הַנִּקְרָא עִקַּר כְּתֻבָּה. וְאִם רָצָה לְהוֹסִיף לָהּ אֲפִלּוּ כִּכַּר זָהָב מוֹסִיף. וְדִין הַתּוֹסֶפֶת וְדִין הָעִקָּר אֶחָד הוּא לְרֹב הַדְּבָרִים. לְפִיכָךְ כָּל מָקוֹם שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר בּוֹ כְּתֻבָּה סְתָם הוּא הָעִקָּר וְהַתּוֹסֶפֶת כְּאֶחָד. וַחֲכָמִים הֵם שֶׁתִּקְּנוּ כְּתֻבָּה לָאִשָּׁה כְּדֵי שֶׁלֹּא תִּהְיֶה קַלָּה בְּעֵינָיו לְהוֹצִיאָהּ:

[A man] must write a marriage contract (a ketubah) [for his wife] before their entry into the chuppah; only afterwards is he permitted to live with his wife. The groom pays the scribe's fee. How much does [the marriage contract require him to promise to have paid to her in the event of his death or his divorcing her]? If the bride is a virgin, no less than 200 dinarim. If she is not a virgin, no less than 100 dinarim. This amount is called the fundamental requirement of the ketubah. If the groom desires to add to this amount he may, [promising any sum,] even a talent of gold. The laws pertaining to this addition and to the fundamental requirement of the ketubah are the same with regard to most matters. Therefore, every time the term ketubah is used without any additional explanation, it should be understood to include the fundamental requirement of the ketubah together with the additional amount [promised by the groom]. It was our Sages who ordained the requirement of [writing] a ketubah for a woman. [They instituted this obligation] so that it would not be a casual matter for [her husband] to divorce her.

דִּינָרִים אֵלּוּ לֹא תִּקְּנוּ אוֹתָם מִן הַכֶּסֶף הַטָּהוֹר אֶלָּא מִמַּטְבֵּעַ שֶׁהָיָה בְּאוֹתָן הַיָּמִים שֶׁהָיָה שִׁבְעָה חֲלָקִים נְחשֶׁת וְאֶחָד כֶּסֶף עַד שֶׁיִּהְיֶה בַּסֶּלַע חֲצִי זוּז כֶּסֶף. וְנִמְצָא מָאתַיִם דִּינָרִים שֶׁל בְּתוּלָה חֲמִשָּׁה וְעֶשְׂרִים זוּזִין שֶׁל כֶּסֶף טָהוֹר וּמֵאָה דִּינָרִים שֶׁל בְּעוּלָה שְׁנֵים עָשָׂר זוּזִים וּמֶחֱצָה. וּמִשְׁקַל כָּל זוּז שֵׁשׁ וְתִשְׁעִים שְׂעוֹרוֹת כְּמוֹ שֶׁבֵּאַרְנוּ בִּתְחִלַּת עֵרוּבִין. וְהַדִּינָר הוּא הַנִּקְרָא זוּז בְּכָל מָקוֹם בֵּין שֶׁיִּהְיֶה מִן הַכֶּסֶף הַטָּהוֹר בֵּין שֶׁיִּהְיֶה מִמַּטְבֵּעַ אוֹתָן הַיָּמִים:

[Our Sages] did not require that these dinarim be of pure silver. Instead, [their intent was] the coin [commonly used] in the [Talmudic] period, which was seven parts copper and one part silver. Thus, a sela (a coin worth four dinarim) contained half a zuz of [pure] silver. And the 200 dinarim to be paid a virgin were equivalent to 25 zuz of pure silver, while the 100 zuz to be paid to a woman who had previously engaged in sexual relations was 12 and a half zuz [of pure silver]. The weight of each zuz is 96 barley corns, as explained at the beginning of [Hilchot] Eruvin. A dinar is universally referred to as a zuz, regardless of whether it was of pure silver or of the coins used in the [Talmudic] period.

אֵין פּוֹחֲתִין לִבְתוּלָה מִמָּאתַיִם וְלִבְעוּלָה מִמֵּאָה. וְכָל הַפּוֹחֵת בְּעִילָתוֹ בְּעִילַת זְנוּת. אֶחָד הַכּוֹתֵב אֶת הַכְּתֻבָּה בִּשְׁטָר וְאֶחָד שֶׁהֵעִידוּ עָלָיו עֵדִים וְקָנוּ מִיָּדוֹ שֶׁהוּא חַיָּב לָהּ מֵאָה אוֹ מָאתַיִם הֲרֵי זֶה מֻתָּר. וְכֵן אִם נָתַן לָהּ מִטַּלְטְלִין כְּנֶגֶד כְּתֻבָּתָהּ הֲרֵי זֶה מֻתָּר לִבְעל עַד שֶׁיִּהְיֶה לוֹ פְּנַאי לִכְתֹּב:

[A marriage contract] for a virgin may not be less than 200 [zuz], nor less than 100 [zuz] for a woman who is not a virgin. Whenever anyone [composes a marriage contract for] a lesser sum, the sexual relations [he conducts with his wife] are considered promiscuous. [Marital relations] are permitted whether the husband composes a legal document [recording] the ketubah, or whether he has witnesses observe him making a commitment for either 100 or 200 [zuz] and [reaffirms that] commitment with a contractual act. Similarly, if [a man] gives his wife possessions equivalent to the value of her ketubah [as security], he is permitted to engage in relations with her until he has the opportunity to [have the document] composed.

הַכּוֹנֵס אֶת הָאִשָּׁה וְלֹא כָּתַב לָהּ כְּתֻבָּה. אוֹ שֶׁכָּתַב וְאָבַד שְׁטַר הַכְּתֻבָּה. אוֹ שֶׁמָּחֲלָה כְּתֻבָּתָהּ לְבַעְלָהּ. אוֹ שֶׁמָּכְרָה לוֹ כְּתֻבָּתָהּ. חוֹזֵר וְכוֹתֵב לָהּ עִקַּר כְּתֻבָּה אִם רָצָה לְקַיְּמָהּ. לְפִי שֶׁאָסוּר לוֹ לְאָדָם לִשְׁהוֹת עִם אִשְׁתּוֹ אֲפִלּוּ שָׁעָה אַחַת בְּלֹא כְּתֻבָּה. אֲבָל הַמּוֹכֶרֶת כְּתֻבָּתָהּ לַאֲחֵרִים בְּטוֹבַת הֲנָאָה אֵינוֹ צָרִיךְ לִכְתֹּב לָהּ כְּתֻבָּה אַחֶרֶת. שֶׁלֹּא תִּקְּנוּ כְּתֻבָּה אֶלָּא כְּדֵי שֶׁלֹּא תְּהֵא קַלָּה בְּעֵינָיו לְהוֹצִיאָהּ. וְאִם הוֹצִיא זֶה מְשַׁלֵּם כְּתֻבָּתָהּ לַלּוֹקֵחַ כְּדֶרֶךְ שֶׁהָיָה מְשַׁלֵּם לָהּ אִם לֹא מָכְרָה:

When a man brings a woman [into a chuppah] without writing a ketubah for her, or he has written her a ketubah but it was lost, or the woman waived the ketubah in favor of her husband, or she sold her ketubah to him, he must compose a document [obligating himself] for [at least] the fundamental requirement of the ketubah if he desires to continue living with his wife. For it is forbidden for a man to continue living with his wife for even a single moment without [her having] a ketubah. When, however, a woman sells her ketubah to others for the possible benefit, [her husband] does not have to write another ketubah for her. For the ketubah was instituted solely so that it would not be a casual matter for [a man] to divorce [his wife]. In this instance, if [the woman's husband] divorces her, he must pay her ketubah to the purchaser in the same way that he would pay her if she had not sold it.

הַמְאָרֵס אֶת הָאִשָּׁה וְכָתַב לָהּ כְּתֻבָּה וְלֹא נִכְנְסָה לַחֻפָּה עֲדַיִן אֲרוּסָה הִיא וְאֵינָהּ נְשׂוּאָה שֶׁאֵין הַכְּתֻבָּה עוֹשָׂה נִשּׂוּאִין. וְאִם מֵת אוֹ גֵּרְשָׁהּ גּוֹבָה עִקַּר כְּתֻבָּתָהּ מִבְּנֵי חוֹרִין וְאֵינָהּ גּוֹבָה תּוֹסֶפֶת כְּלָל הוֹאִיל וְלֹא כְּנָסָהּ. אֲבָל אִם אֵרֵס אִשָּׁה וְלֹא כָּתַב לָהּ כְּתֻבָּה וָמֵת אוֹ גֵּרְשָׁהּ וְהִיא אֲרוּסָה אֵין לָהּ כְּלוּם וַאֲפִלּוּ הָעִקָּר שֶׁלֹּא תִּקְּנוּ לָהּ עִקַּר כְּתֻבָּה עַד שֶׁתִּנָּשֵׂא אוֹ עַד שֶׁיִּכְתֹּב. וְהַמְאָרֵס אֶת בִּתּוֹ וְכָתַב לָהּ כְּתֻבָּה וָמֵת אוֹ גֵּרְשָׁהּ כְּשֶׁהָיְתָה נַעֲרָה כְּתֻבָּתָהּ לְאָבִיהָ כְּמוֹ שֶׁבֵּאַרְנוּ [לְמַעְלָה בְּפֶרֶק שְׁלִישִׁי]:

When [a man] consecrates a woman and writes her a ketubah, but does not enter into a chuppah with her, her status is that of an arusah and not that of a nesu'ah. For a ketubah does not bring about nisu'in. If [the husband] dies or divorces her, she may collect the fundamental requirement of the ketubah from property possessed by the man or his estate. She does not collect the additional sum [that he attached to the ketubah] at all, for they did not enter [a chuppah]. If, by contrast, a man consecrates a woman and does not write a ketubah for her, and he dies or divorces her while she is still an arusah, she has no claim against him, not even for the fundamental [requirement of the ketubah]. For our Sages did not grant [a woman] the fundamental requirement of the ketubah until the marriage is consummated or until the husband writes a document for her. When a man consecrates his daughter, and [her intended husband] writes her a ketubah and dies or divorces her while she is a na'arah, her father receives [payment for] her ketubah, as explained in Chapter Three above.

וְכֵן תִּקְּנוּ חֲכָמִים שֶׁכָּל הַנּוֹשֵׂא בְּתוּלָה יִהְיֶה שָׂמֵחַ עִמָּהּ שִׁבְעַת יָמִים. אֵינוֹ עוֹסֵק בִּמְלַאכְתּוֹ וְלֹא נוֹשֵׂא וְנוֹתֵן בַּשּׁוּק אֶלָּא אוֹכֵל וְשׁוֹתֶה וְשָׂמֵחַ. בֵּין שֶׁהָיָה בָּחוּר בֵּין שֶׁהָיָה אַלְמוֹן. וְאִם הָיְתָה בְּעוּלָה אֵין פָּחוֹת מִשְּׁלֹשָׁה יָמִים. שֶׁתַּקָּנַת חֲכָמִים הִיא לִבְנוֹת יִשְׂרָאֵל שֶׁיִּהְיֶה שָׂמֵחַ עִם הַבְּעוּלָה שְׁלֹשָׁה יָמִים בֵּין בָּחוּר בֵּין אַלְמוֹן:

Similarly, our Sages ordained that whoever weds a virgin should celebrate with her for seven days. He should not pursue his occupation, nor should he involve himself in commercial dealings; he should eat, drink and celebrate. [This ruling applies] regardless of whether the groom had been married before or not. If the bride is not a virgin, [he should celebrate with her] for no less than three days. For it is an ordinance of our Sages that a husband - regardless of whether he was married before or not - should celebrate with a non-virgin bride for three days.

יֵשׁ לוֹ לְאָדָם לִשָּׂא נָשִׁים רַבּוֹת כְּאַחַת בְּיוֹם אֶחָד וּמְבָרֵךְ בִּרְכַּת חֲתָנִים לְכֻלָּן כְּאַחַת. אֲבָל לְשִׂמְחָה צָרִיךְ לִשְׂמֹחַ עִם כָּל אַחַת שִׂמְחָה הָרְאוּיָה לָהּ. עִם בְּתוּלָה שִׁבְעָה. עִם בְּעוּלָה שְׁלֹשָׁה. וְאֵין מְעָרְבִין שִׂמְחָה בְּשִׂמְחָה:

A man may wed several women at one time on one day and recite the marriage blessings for all of them at the same time. With regard to the celebrations, however, he must rejoice with each bride the time allotted to her: seven days for a virgin, three days for a non-virgin. One celebration should not be allowed to overlap with another.

מֻתָּר לְאָרֵס בְּכָל יוֹם חֹל אֲפִלּוּ בְּתִשְׁעָה בְּאָב בֵּין בַּיּוֹם בֵּין בַּלַּיְלָה. אֲבָל אֵין נוֹשְׂאִין נָשִׁים לֹא בְּעֶרֶב שַׁבָּת וְלֹא בְּאֶחָד בְּשַׁבָּת גְּזֵרָה שֶׁמָּא יָבוֹא לִידֵי חִלּוּל שַׁבָּת בְּתִקּוּן הַסְּעֵדָּה שֶׁהֶחָתָן טָרוּד בַּסְּעֻדָּה. וְאֵין צָרִיךְ לוֹמַר שֶׁאָסוּר לִשָּׂא אִשָּׁה בְּשַׁבָּת. וַאֲפִלּוּ בְּחֻלּוֹ שֶׁל מוֹעֵד אֵין נוֹשְׂאִין נָשִׁים כְּמוֹ שֶׁבֵּאַרְנוּ לְפִי שֶׁאֵין מְעָרְבִין שִׂמְחָה בְּשִׂמְחָה שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (בראשית כט כז) "מַלֵּא שְׁבֻעַ זֹאת וְנִתְּנָה לְךָ גַּם אֶת זֹאת". וּשְׁאָר הַיָּמִים מֻתָּר לִשָּׂא אִשָּׁה בְּכָל יוֹם שֶׁיִּרְצֶה וְהוּא שֶׁיִּטְרַח בִּסְעֻדַּת נִשּׂוּאִין שְׁלֹשָׁה יָמִים קֹדֶם הַנִּשּׂוּאִין:

It is permitted to consecrate a woman on any weekday, even on Tish'ah B'Av, whether during the day or during the night. With regard to weddings, by contrast, a wedding is not conducted on a Friday or a Sunday. [This is] a decree, [ordained] lest conducting the wedding feast lead to the desecration of the Sabbath, for a groom is preoccupied with the wedding feast. Needless to say, a wedding is not conducted on the Sabbath. Even on Chol HaMo'ed weddings are not held, as we have explained, for one celebration should not be mixed with another, as [implied by Genesis 29:27]: "Complete the week [of celebration] of this one and then I will give you this other one." On other days, it is permitted to wed a woman on any day one desires, provided one spends three days preparing for the wedding feast.

מָקוֹם שֶׁאֵין בֵּית דִּין יוֹשְׁבִין בּוֹ אֶלָּא בְּשֵׁנִי וּבַחֲמִישִׁי בִּלְבַד בְּתוּלָה נִשֵּׂאת בְּיוֹם רְבִיעִי שֶׁאִם הָיְתָה לוֹ טַעֲנַת בְּתוּלִים יַשְׁכִּים לְבֵית דִּין. וּמִנְהַג חֲכָמִים שֶׁהַנּוֹשֵׂא אֶת הַבְּעוּלָה יִשָּׂאֶנָּה בַּחֲמִישִׁי כְּדֵי שֶׁיִּהְיֶה שָׂמֵחַ עִמָּהּ חֲמִישִׁי וְעֶרֶב שַׁבָּת וְשַׁבָּת וְיוֹצֵא לִמְלַאכְתּוֹ יוֹם רִאשׁוֹן:

In a locale where the court holds session only on Monday and Thursday, a virgin bride should be wed on Wednesday. Thus, if her husband has a claim with regard to her virginity, he can take it to the court early the next morning. It is the custom of the Sages that a man who weds a non-virgin bride should wed her on Thursday, so that he will celebrate with her on Thursday, Friday and the Sabbath. On Sunday, he will go back to work.

הַמְאָרֵס אֶת בִּתּוֹ קְטַנָּה וּתְבָעָהּ הַבַּעַל לְנִשּׂוּאִין. בֵּין הִיא בֵּין אָבִיהָ יְכוֹלִין לְעַכֵּב שֶׁלֹּא תִּנָּשֵׂא עַד שֶׁתַּגְדִּיל וְתֵעָשֶׂה נַעֲרָה וְאִם רָצָה לְכָנְסָהּ כּוֹנֵס. וְאֵין רָאוּי לַעֲשׂוֹת כֵּן:

When a man consecrates his daughter while she is below the age of majority, both she and her father may object and delay the wedding until she comes of age and becomes a na'arah. If [the husband] desires to wed her, he may. It is not proper, however, to do so.

אֵרְסָהּ וְשָׁהָה כַּמָּה שָׁנִים וּתְבָעָהּ לְנִשּׂוּאִין וַהֲרֵי הִיא נַעֲרָה נוֹתְנִין לָהּ י"ב חֹדֶשׁ מִיּוֹם הַתְּבִיעָה לְפַרְנֵס אֶת עַצְמָהּ וּלְתַקֵּן מַה שֶּׁהִיא צְרִיכָה לָהּ וְאַחַר כָּךְ תִּנָּשֵׂא. תְּבָעָהּ אַחַר שֶׁבָּגְרָה נוֹתְנִין לָהּ י"ב חֹדֶשׁ מִיּוֹם הַבֶּגֶר. וְכֵן אִם קִדְּשָׁהּ בְּיוֹם הַבֶּגֶר נוֹתְנִין לָהּ י"ב חֹדֶשׁ מִיּוֹם הַקִּדּוּשִׁין שֶׁהוּא יוֹם הַבֶּגֶר. קִדְּשָׁהּ אַחַר שֶׁבָּגְרָה אִם עָבְרוּ עָלֶיהָ י"ב חֹדֶשׁ בְּבַגְרוּתָהּ וּלְאַחַר כָּךְ נִתְקַדְּשָׁה אֵין נוֹתְנִין לָהּ אֶלָּא שְׁלֹשִׁים יוֹם מִיּוֹם הַתְּבִיעָה. וְכֵן הַמְאָרֵס אֶת הַבְּעוּלָה נוֹתְנִין לָהּ שְׁלֹשִׁים יוֹם מִיּוֹם הַתְּבִיעָה:

If a man consecrated [a girl], delayed several years, and seeks to wed her while she is a na'arah, the girl is given twelve months from the day he makes his request, to outfit herself and prepare what she needs for him. Only afterwards, must she wed. If he makes his request after she becomes a bogeret, she is given twelve months from the day she becomes a bogeret. Similarly, if he consecrates her on the day on which she becomes a bogeret, she is given twelve months from the day of the kiddushin - i.e., the day on which she became a bogeret. When he consecrates her after she has become a bogeret, if more than twelve months have passed from the time she became a bogeret until he consecrates her, she is given only 30 days from the day he requests to wed her [to prepare]. Similarly, when a man consecrates a non-virgin bride, she is given 30 days [to prepare] from the day he requests to wed her.

כְּשֵׁם שֶׁנּוֹתְנִין זְמַן לָאִשָּׁה מִשֶּׁתְּבָעָהּ הַבַּעַל לְפַרְנֵס אֶת עַצְמָהּ וְאַחַר כָּךְ תִּנָּשֵׂא כָּךְ נוֹתְנִין זְמַן לָאִישׁ לְפַרְנֵס אֵת עַצְמוֹ מִשֶּׁתָּבְעָה הָאִשָּׁה אוֹתוֹ. וְכַמָּה נוֹתְנִין לוֹ כְּמוֹ שֶׁנּוֹתְנִין לָהּ אִם י"ב חֹדֶשׁ י"ב חֹדֶשׁ וְאִם שְׁלֹשִׁים יוֹם שְׁלֹשִׁים יוֹם:

Just as a woman is given time to outfit herself after her groom requests to wed her and then the wedding is held, so too, time is granted to the man to prepare himself if the woman requests the wedding to be held. How much time is granted him? The same as is granted her. If [she would be granted] twelve months, [he is granted] twelve months. If [she would be granted] thirty days, [he is granted] thirty days.

הִגִּיעַ זְמַן שֶׁנָּתְנוּ לָאִישׁ וְלֹא נְשָׂאָהּ נִתְחַיֵּב בִּמְזוֹנוֹתֶיהָ אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁלֹּא כָּנַס. וְאִם הִגִּיעַ הַזְּמַן בְּאֶחָד בְּשַׁבָּת אוֹ בְּעֶרֶב שַׁבָּת אֵינוֹ מַעֲלֶה לָהּ מְזוֹנוֹת בְּאוֹתוֹ הַיּוֹם מִפְּנֵי שֶׁאֵינוֹ יָכוֹל לִכְנֹס. וְכֵן אִם חָלָה הוּא אוֹ הִיא אוֹ שֶׁפֵּרְסָה נִדָּה כְּשֶׁהִגִּיעַ הַזְּמַן אֵינוֹ מַעֲלֶה לָהּ מְזוֹנוֹת שֶׁהֲרֵי אֵינָהּ רְאוּיָה לְהִנָּשֵׂא עַד שֶׁתִּטְהַר אוֹ עַד שֶׁתַּבְרִיא. וְכֵן הוּא אֵינוֹ יָכוֹל לִשָּׂא אִשָּׁה עַד שֶׁיַּבְרִיא:

When the time allotted to the man passes and he still has not wed his arusah, he is obligated to provide her livelihood, although they have not wed. [Nevertheless,] if [the final day in] the time allotted him falls on Sunday or Friday, he is not liable for her livelihood on that day, for the wedding cannot be held then. Similarly, if he or she falls ill or she enters the niddah state at the conclusion of the time allotted him, he is not obligated to provide her with her livelihood. For she is not fit to wed until she purifies herself, or until she becomes healthy. Similarly, he is not able to wed a woman until he regains his health.